


The Gay Gatsby

by YeetTheAngels



Category: Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Crack, Homophobic Language, M/M, Parody, Screenplay/Script Format, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:15:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28477524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YeetTheAngels/pseuds/YeetTheAngels
Summary: Nick Carraway, an openly gay freshman at Fitzgerald University, deals with bullies and his crush on his oblivious roommate Jay Gatsby.(In celebration of The Great Gatsby's copyright expiring on January 1st, 2021!)
Relationships: Daisy Buchanan/Tom Buchanan, Nick Carraway/Jay Gatsby
Kudos: 20





	The Gay Gatsby

**Scene 1**   
_Dorms of Fitzgerald University_

Nick: _(Narrating)_ In my younger and more vulnerable years, my dad gave me some advice. “Just be yourself, no matter what.” And this had stuck with me for many many years, even when the times I struggled with coming out of the closet. My name’s Nick Carraway, or Carragay like my sexual orientation, and it’s my freshman year at Fitzgerald University. This was supposed to be a good year, make some friends, get through classes without being bullied for being homosexual…   
_Nick enters stage left. (Lights on.)_  
Nick: _If my actual roommate had bothered to show up at all!_ It’s been 3 months, _3 whole months_ , and I have never seen him. Not even once.  
Nick: _(Sighs)_ Honestly, I’m starting to think he doesn’t exist. The only proof that I have a roommate is the constant stream of visitors coming to find him. They all leave, disgusted, when they find out he’s rooming with me.  
 _Jay enters._  
Nick: Oh wow. Hello, haven't seen you around here, do you know my roommate Jay Gatsby? He's been absent for three whole months.  
 _Jay looks at Nick as if Nick fails to understand_  
Jay: _(Suddenly)_ I’m Jay.  
Nick: _(Softly)_ And I’m gay.  
 _Daisy and Tom walk by and overhears their conversation. Daisy is holding a salad. Tom is holding a hamburger._  
Daisy: _(Shocked)_ I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY'RE ROOMMATES _(muttering to Tom)_ My ex rooming with my gay cousin?! OMG.  
Tom: _(Quietly)_ Oh my gosh, they are roommates. _(condescendingly)_ No wonder you dumped him; he’s associating with… _(waves hands vaguely) these_ kind of people.   
Jay: _(turns back to Nick)_ Hm? Old sport? Did you say something?  
Nick: _(frustrated)_ … It didn’t matter.  
Jay: _(curious, leaning closer to Nick)_ But I swore I heard-  
 _Nick and Jay’s faces are oddly close for some reason._  
Daisy: _(scornfully)_ Not in front of my SALAD! Get a room, you crumbs.  
 _Tom pushes Nick away forcefully to leave. Daisy and Tom leave._  
Nick: Don’t mind them, my cousin is kinda stupid sometimes. And Tom is always stupid.  
Jay: She’s your cousin? She just dumped me for that guy like 3 minutes ago. I used to live at her dorm. So I guess I’m just gonna stay here. At my real dorm. _(Smiles)_  
Nick: _(shyly)_ Y-you have a beautiful smile.  
Jay: _(also smiling)_ Thank you… also, did you say you’re Daisy’s cousin? Can you do me a favour?  
 _(Blackout)_

~

**Scene 2**

_(Lights on)_  
Nick and Jay enter.  
Nick: If you want to get Daisy back, you should just remind her of the good times you had together.  
Jay: But how?  
Nick: What do you mean, how? Don’t you two share any happy memories together?  
Jay: Does her chugging 3 pumpkin spice lattes in a row count? She won 50 bucks that day.  
Nick: No. Uh… how did you two first meet?  
Jay: We met at prom a while ago. I spilled some punch on her and she slapped me. It was awesome.   
Nick: Uhhhhh… _(changes topic)_ How about we have a dorm party and invite her?  
Jay: _(hopeful)_ She would come, right?  
Nick: _(sarcastically)_ Yeah, she’s my homophobic cousin who loves parties.  
Jay: _(ignores him because he’s too excited)_ We will be having it on Friday and DON’T INVITE TOM.  
 _(Jay leaves in excitement. He is skipping in joy.)_  
Nick: I can’t believe it. Jay’s one of the few that’s actually nice to me. I don’t think Daisy is a good match for him, but if it’s for Jay’s happiness, I’ll do it…   
_(Blackout)_

~

**Scene 3**

_(Lights on)_  
 _(Nick and Jay enter. Tom and Daisy enter, talking to each other in hushed voices and sending looks at Nick and Jay. They notice.)_  
Jay: _(to Nick)_ I hate to say this, old sport, but I have a feeling people are gossiping about you. Not that I have anything against different sexual orientations.  
Nick: _(dejected)_ Yeah, I know. Don’t they have basic respect for human beings? I can’t help it if I’m gay. They can’t help it if they’re straight.  
Jay: It’s just mean for them to push you around you and call you names.  
Tom: _(violently)_ Civilization’s going to pieces. I can’t believe the disrespect they have for family life and family institutions! _(sighs)_ Next they’ll throw _everything_ overboard and have intermarriage between man and man. It’s best we remove the roots of all sin from this school. _(sighs again and shakes his head)_ I do hope the principal expels them.  
Nick: _(whispering to Jay)_ Ah yes, Tom, the classic homophobe. Daisy is slightly better; she only tolerates me because we’re cousins.  
Daisy: _(calling to Nick)_ Nick! I heard you’re hosting a dorm party! When is it?  
 _(Jay walks away awkwardly)_  
Nick: Next Friday.   
Tom: _(looking at him with clear dislike)_ I'm not coming. I'm not associating with Mr. Nobodies from Nowhere. Especially hosted by a guy who’s attracted to other guys….  
Daisy: _(brightly)_ I LOVE parties! I'm definitely coming!  
 _(Blackout)_

~

**Scene 4**   
_Dorm party._

_(Lights on)_  
 _(Daisy is hanging out as Jay and Nick approach her)_  
Nick: _(sadly)_ I’ll just leave you guys here. Good luck pal. _(Pats Jay’s shoulder and leaves)_  
Jay: Hey, uh Daisy, I just want to tell you that I have been thinking about you these days and I still love you very much. Remember how I spilled punch on you and you slapped me? I really miss you.   
Daisy: Why are you so obsessed with me? I’m done with you. Tom is way better than you. Get lost, psycho.  
Jay: _(hurt)_ But Nick said you’d take me back if I hosted this really cool party. Nick’s actually really cool and friendly, and he doesn’t see me as just a rich guy-  
Daisy: It’s always “Nick” this and “Nick” that. What do you even like about him? Oh gosh, I can’t believe he’s turning you to the dark side.   
_(Daisy stomps off angrily.)_  
Jay: You just hate him because he’s gay! And that’s not fair! He’s not that bad? And he’s smart, and witty, and charming, and he has a nice smile, and-  
 _(He pauses.)_  
Jay: Oh my gosh. I’m in love with Nick. (Runs off stage)

~

**Scene 5**

_Nick and Jay enter from opposite ends of the stage_  
Nick and Jay: _(at the same time)_ I have something to tell you. (Pause) Wait, what?  
Nick: You first.  
Jay: No, you.  
Nick: I’m being expelled.  
Jay: _(shocked)_ WHAT? Why?  
Nick: The school thinks my open sexuality is going to turn everyone gay and I’ll be _(makes quotation signs)_ “threatening family life and family institutions”. A ridiculous idea, really. It’s 20xx. Love wins.   
Tom: _(Comes on stage with Daisy)_ Oh look, it’s the fairy again.  
Daisy: _(Sarcastically)_ Nick, you absolute rose, I’m so sorry for you. But the thing is we just- just can’t let gay people wander around in our society. I hope you find a nice woman to turn you back to normal. You don’t deserve this, sweetie.  
Tom: Yeah, I mean if men can marry other men who will produce children in this world?   
Nick: Hopefully not you. _(dabs)_  
 _Beat._  
Jay: _(starts to clap)_ Oof. Sick burn.  
Tom: You’re crazy, Nick. Completely bananas. I don’t know what’s the matter with you.  
Nick: It’s just a preference. Like how some people like cake, some like pudding, some like both, and some like neither. It’s nothing unnatural, and that’s okay. We aren’t a danger to society, and we won’t “threaten family life and family institutions.” Two men can be parents. Two women can be parents.   
Tom: Fine! Have it your way. _(splutters and leaves with Daisy)_  
Nick: _(walks closer)_ So… what was it that you wanted to tell me?  
Jay: Uhh… Okay, so I think I’m a little gay for you.  
Nick: Only a little? Jay, even though we were 5 feet apart, we chilled in a hot tub together!  
Jay: Okay, I’m very gay. And I’m going to stop the school from expelling you.  
Nick: But how? I mean, it’s not like Principal Cody’s your dad or anything.  
 _(Jay shifts awkwardly. Beat.)_  
Nick: _(shocked)_ He is? I didn’t know Principal Cody was your dad!  
Jay: He’s my godfather. I can ask him to reject the school’s expulsion.  
Nick: You would do that… for me?  
Jay: I realised how much you mean to me, Nick. Of course I would do that. Anything for you, old sport.  
 _(They hug)_  
Jay: No homo, right?  
Nick: _(Pulls apart, deadpan look of disapproval at Jay)_ Jay…  
Jay: Alright, alright.  
 _(ending music)_

**Author's Note:**

> kdjfhkjshfjkkjsdfj this was a school project me and my 3 memer friends made in 2019  
> one day we'll make a full length stage play/musical out of this and blow everyone's minds  
> if ur one of my 3 friends and u see this ur not allowed to join my server or follow me on twt please its for ur own good i dont need anyone who knows me irl to see my degeneracy  
> ~  
> My server (plz intro for access):  
> https://discord.gg/geqFYqAvft  
> My twitter:  
> https://twitter.com/AngelsYeet


End file.
